Today we were talking about names and how, if one of our children became a nun they would take on a new name, or if baby brother became a priest he would be Fr. (insert last name here). I left the room and the Queen came up and said, "We want to know why the woman has to take the man's last name when they get married."
"Um, that's a hard one." She left to announce my response as I said a quick prayer, "Come on Lord! help me out here!" Then it hit me. I walked back in the kitchen and took a deep breath.
"Ok, you know how a marriage is supposed to mirror or reflect the relationship between Christ and the Church? Daddy is supposed to be Christ for all of us. He is supposed to "die on the cross" for me and us like Christ did. Mommy is supposed to submit to daddy like the Church does to Christ. Right? (nodding of heads) And when we say we are "Christians" we are saying we are followers of him, we are with him, we belong to him. We don't say, "I am a Suzy-ian or a Bob-ian who follows Christ." We take Christ's name. So, because daddy is the head of our family, we take his name. It doesn't mean that I lose who I am. But when I chose to marry your daddy, we became one person, one unit, we belong to each other. and (unexpected emotional response) I am proud to take your daddy's name. There are some women who choose to keep their name or combine both names, and I don't think differently of them for doing it, it was just not what I chose to do."
My oldest son after a moment said, "Mom, when I see you cry, I get a bad feeling, it makes me sad, I don't like it."
"There are some important things you need to know about women. Women cry alot. They cry when they are happy, when they are sad, when something moves them, pretty much all the time. See, you only cry really when you are hurt or upset. And there is a good reason for that. God made men and women different. Equal, but different. Women are naturally more emotional and tend to show their feelings more. This is part of what makes them good mothers, more compassionate and understanding people."
"But mom, didn't I hear you say to someone that because of all the hormones in the food some men are beginning to act more like women?" (Uuuuuuh, hm, did I say that?) Um, well, men that act like women are doing it for many other reasons than because of the milk they might be drinking. But here is the bottom line. God created us equal, but uniquely different. The best way for a woman to give the greatest glory to God, to reflect her part of his image perfectly, is to be fully woman. The best way for a man to give glory to God and reflect his part of his image, is to be fully man, but the Devil figures if he can confuse us, make us think it doesn't matter, then we won't be living up to that full potential we were created for."
Then the queen spoke up, "What if we had to take the FIRST name?"
"Well, I would have to love someone an aweful lot to do that." I said.
Then she said, "or what if the guy's name was something like, Snorkel Porkchops?"
"Well, if you decide to marry someone named, Snorkel Porkchops, he better be a darn good catholic."